My Gratitude Journal

Suddenly a bottle flies from around the corner, kicked by the boy and his sister. The two in hot pursuit of the empty bottle to pass the time. Lost in their game, joy permeates the poverty-stricken village the children are growing up in. Weaving through the crowded bazaar, the boy and girl lost themselves in a game rather than the people surrounding them. The bottle falls perfectly in front of the boy and he strikes the plastic container with all his might. THUMP. The bottle launches off the boy’s foot, soaring, crashing down in the nearby alleyway. The girl looks at her brother disapprovingly. Before the girl has a chance to scold her brother, he is off to retrieve the bottle. The boy finds his toy in front of an old man with a familiar face. The boy reaches for the bottle when suddenly the man with the familiar face speaks. 

“Boy, do you want to know your destiny?”

The boy, curious, nods and grips his bottle tight to avoid giving up his treasure as payment for the future. The old man clears his throat and sits upright. The boy sees the man with a familiar face again but this time what lies under his hood. The boy sees each crease and winkle carved into the man with a familiar face. He is tan and frail but the boy stands unafraid. The man with a familiar face holds out his fist, enclosed with a gift for the brave boy who seeks the answers to the future. 

“I am Fear and you will find me in the darkness of each day.”

Reaching for his prize. The boy steps closer to the old man. 

“I am Vanity and you will find me standing in the way of growth.”

The boy again steps closer to the old man. 

“I am Death and you will find me on your final day after I have taken everything from you.”

The boy, entranced, ready to accept the would-be token from the man with a familiar face stops to pause. The boy takes a step back and refocuses his gaze, moving now from the outstretched hand to the hood of the old man. The man with a familiar face again speaks. 

“I am Hope and you will find me in the horizon of each morning.”

The wind blows, rustling the hood of the man with the familiar face. The boy now sees the piercing ocean blue eyes of the old man. Full of warmth, the boy remains motionless, breathing.

“I am Change.” The man says. “You will find me after every storm.”

The boy stretches out his hand to receive his gift and learn his fate. 

“I am Love and you will find me in your heart whenever you use the key.”

The man with a familiar face opens his hand to reveal a rusty key inside. The boy takes the key and examines the trinket. The boy asks,

“What is this for? You didn’t tell me about my destiny.”

The man with a familiar face smiles. 

“This key is special. It does not open any door nor any lock. The key is not made of gold and cannot be traded for anything of value. The key is for you boy and it will unlock the best this life has to offer. Hold on to the key and you will find your destiny not in the past or future, but in the present moment.”

The wind picks up and the old man vanishes into the air from under his hood, leaving behind the boy and his belongings. The boy looks around, in his left hand the bottle him and his sister were playing with. In his right hand, the key the man with a familiar face gave him. The boy places the key in his left shirt pocket and returns to his sister with the bottle. The children resume playing and laughing together as if nothing had happened. The boy would always remember the day he got the key to his destiny. 

My Story

The man with a familiar face exists in all of our lives but takes on different shapes and forms. We will encounter face the fears of the unknown, the challenges of comfort and complacency, and the ultimate realization that everything ends and life is impermanent. The man also takes shape in other ways. We will find the real treasures of life after taking a breath, patient. Change is all around us and can lead to growth and learning if we choose to embrace it. Love exists in all things and gratitude can be the key that unlocks it.

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. Sharing gratitude
2. Warm tea on a cold winter morning
3. My family, sitting around the table together
4. Clean water and texts from Cambodia
5. A chance to journal and reflect
6. New beginnings and embracing change
7. Good health and safe travels
8. My CHC and Kennedy Peer Mentors
9. A good book and time at the gym
10. A day to rest and recharge
11. Cooking together and learning new things
12. Finding and sharing new music
13. Support from friends and mentors
14. The warmth of the summer sun
15. The sound of the train passing in still nights
16. Finding new places and a summer abroad
17. Liverpool Football and belief across continents
18. A rainy day to walk the pier
19. People who work hard and inspire others
20. Finding Frank and Holly
21. Warm blankets and comfy pillows
22. The Boyden steps and midnight reflection
23. My friends and brothers from BSU
24. The little things
25. The here and now

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Featured image from Iceland, a crossroad in my own life.

Over the past year of writing daily gratitude, I have found it’s not always easy. Sometimes I struggle because I’m unwilling to accept change or look at something from a different perspective. This is where we stay stagnant. Immovable in our conviction, time and adversity force our hand to discover new solutions.

The only way that we can live, is if we grow. The only way that we can grow is if we change. The only way that we can change is if we learn. The only way we can learn is if we are exposed. And the only way that we can become exposed is if we throw ourselves out into the open. Do it. Throw yourself.

C. Joybell C.

More than a year has passed since I began writing about gratitude and there have been many lessons learned along the way. I traveled in the summer only to be brought home and sent back. I returned to UMass with hopes of change and found myself in routine. We are never done learning. Life is full of adversity and we find it in the most unexpected of places sometimes. It is the act of overcoming that teaches us about ourselves. We learn these lessons when we’re ready and sometimes when we’re not. Whether we ask for help or succeed independently, know that we have the opportunity to grow every day.

02.26.19

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. Pickup soccer
2. Making new friends
3. Sharing gratitude
4. Productive time
5. Calls from my mom
6. Naps with my cat, Ned
7. Clean water and texts from Cambodia
8. My supervisor, Adam
9. My continued education at UMass
10. Long runs and loud music
11. The morning sun
12. Positive thoughts and positive people
13. Warm socks at the cabin
14. Board game night with my family
15. Birds chirping outside my window
16. A clear view of the stars painted in the dark night sky
17. What hard work brings
18. Days I get to sleep in under warm blankets
19. Cooking class with JV
20. Learning new things
21. Helping people out
22. Local breakfast
23. A good book to read
24. Teachers, mentors, and coaches
25. The here and now

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Featured image from Iceland

Quickly pacing. Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot. Anxious. I found myself on the platform next to the train tracks. I memorized each crevice in the ground as I tried to work through my panic. The music in my headphones would not drown out my torturous thoughts. I trapped myself in my mind, determined to make myself feel awful in the process.

I have to stop, I told myself. My feet kept moving.

Just talk to someone, you’ll feel better. I was not very convincing.

The platform came to life as the scheduled train began to approach. I calmed down for the sake of my own embarrassment and took a seat on an empty bench. A deep breath in and a deep breath out. I had to do something. The incessant pacing was not helping and I was not about to spend my entire day anxiously walking in circles. I went back inside and cleared a space on my desk in my room. I unearthed a journal given to me and stared at the blank pages. I had used the journal a handful of times prior for half-baked thoughts and nonsensical ideas. I tore out the used pages and told myself I was starting fresh. I began to write.

At first, I was unsure who to address. Was I writing to myself in the future if I decided to read the entry again? Was I writing to the people I needed help from? My writing became a stream of consciousness. It became a brain dump onto the empty white pages that sat and stared back at me. I tried to write as quickly as the thoughts would enter my head. I journaled out of need. I wrote down the words that would acknowledge my feelings and I felt better.

Writing didn’t become a habit right away for me and it is still something I have to make time for. Writing in my journal and writing about gratitude bring me clarity. A daily journal and a daily blog to remind me of the treasures worth remembering. Not every day has been a miracle, far from it. The fact of the matter is, we must continue. We can stop at any time, breathe, and do what we must to go on living.

02.14.19

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. Mornings with my cat, Ned
2. Peanut butter
3. Time at the gym to clear my head
4. Clean water and texts from Cambodia
5. A weekend to relax
6. Cooking classes and learning new things
7. Comfy pillows and warm blankets
8. Shared anything
9. When I can support and encourage my friends
10. My Bridgewater blanket
11. Teachers, Mentors, and Coaches
12. Walks around Horn Pond with my Grandma
13. The sound of birds outside my window
14. Nights spent watching the stars
15. The warmth of the summer sun
16. The sound of rain and the impenetrable fog
17. Patient reminders from the Universe
18. Days I get to teach
19. My Peer Mentors here at UMass
20. My family
21. The power of gratitude and a few deep breaths
22. Late night ice cream
23. Safe travels and good health
24. Warm delicious tea
25. The here and now

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Featured image of Anfield, a place of dreams

Go outside. Don’t tell anyone and don’t bring your phone. Start walking and keep walking until you no longer know the road like the palm of your hand, because we walk the same roads day in and day out, to the bus and back home and we cease to see. We walk in our sleep and teach our muscles to work without thinking and I dare you to walk where you have not yet walked and I dare you to notice. Don’t try to get anything out of it, because you won’t. Don’t try to make use of it, because you can’t. And that’s the point. Just walk, see, sit down if you like. And be. Just be, whatever you are with whatever you have, and realise that that is enough to be happy. 
There’s a whole world out there, right outside your window. You’d be a fool to miss it.

Charlotte Eriksson

02.22.19

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. The end of a long week
2. Facilitation practice
3. A chance to finally relax
4. Thoughtful expression
5. A chance to journal and reflect
6. Safe travels around the word
7. Lessons learned
8. Learning to let go
9. Challenging professors
10. My family and texts from home
11. Time with my cat, Ned
12. Sharing stories and pictures
13. Clean water and morning tea
14. The warmth of the summer sun
15. Home cooked meals
16. RHA and Chapter Wednesdays
17. The Boyden Steps
18. People who encourage and inspire
19. A chance to help
20. Singing in the car
21. A clean apartment and a clear mind
22. Sharing gratitude
23. Walks through campus in the summer
24. A couple deep breaths
25. The here and now

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Featured image from the BSU lake

I’ve come to learn that our world isn’t so black and white. It shouldn’t have to be all or nothing in every circumstance. Sometimes the answers we seek go beyond option A and option B. We need to find for ourselves a middle ground. A way to consider the needs of others and ourselves.

Life isn’t about all or nothing. Life is built on both patience & action, consistency & adaptability, life & death. These concepts of life don’t simply go beyond the mundane of our day to day. Balance needs to exist in all things. Sleep, work, play, it all needs to fit in the only 24 hours we have each day. Let gratitude help get you there. One day at a time.

02.20.19

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. A warm cup of tea
2. Walks through an empty campus
3. Hanging out with my cat
4. My supervisors, Adam and Danielle
5. Time to journal
6. Bedtime stretches
7. My continued education
8. Talking things out
9. My family
10. Naps after work
11. The sound of rain while I sleep
12. Summer grilling
13. The bike trail in Northampton
14. Classic movies
15. Home cooking
16. Snow days and cancelled classes
17. Getting stuff done
18. Good communication and good company
19. Healthy living and constant progress
20. Learning new things
21. Teaching CORE at UMass
22. Music you can dance to
23. Sharing gratitude
24. Comfy pillows and blankets
25. The here and now

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Featured image from Acadia

Whatever the challenge, no matter how difficult, remember to take your time. There’s nothing you are unequipped to handle. You are exactly where you should be.

Take a breathe. You’re doing great.

Sometimes the reminder is helpful. After a long day, remember you’ve done all you can. Tomorrow is a new day, a new opportunity to achieve your goals.

Just start with your breathe.

02.19.19

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. Talking things out
2. Seeing my mom and brother
3. My cat, Ned
4. Time at the gym
5. My CORE students
6. Feeling better
7. Making the most of it
8. Pick up soccer
9. Sharing music suggestions from my PMs
10. Safe travels
11. Walks around the pond with my grandma
12. Moments of learning
13. Patient reminders
14. Honest communication
15. Getting stuff done
16. Late night talks with my dad
17. Clean water
18. Texts from Cambodia
19. My friend Riley for always checking in
20. Sharing gratitude
21. Late night ice cream with JV
22. The warm summer sun
23. Embracing change
24. Trips to Big Y
25. The precious present

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Featured image of the imminent sunset.

It’s important to recognize how far we’ve come. We can use gratitude when looking back at the adversities we overcome and the lesson’s we have learned. To get where we want to go, what we have done isn’t enough.

Success isn’t always about greatness. It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come.

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson

We must continue. We must keep fighting, keep moving towards our goals. Then we can use gratitude for what keeps us going.

02.15.19

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. Meeting the vibrant sunrise with warm tea and my cat by my side
2. Liverpool football games
3. Quality time with JV
4. A clean apartment is a clean mind
5. Mentors, teachers, and coaches
6. My family
7. An opportunity to prove myself
8. A good feeling
9. Sharing gratitude with this community
10. Late night ice cream
11. Ezra Bell (here) on Spotify
12. Routine and planning
13. Peanut butter sandwiches
14. Clean water and texts from Cambodia
15. Reasons to celebrate
16. A reminder of Spring
17. Perfect descriptions
18. Earth’s impossible moments of beauty
19. What comes after the rain storm
20. Time to be an introvert
21. Calls from home
22. Tools for my mental health
23. Learning from mistakes
24. A good book
25. The precious, precious present

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Forever missing the warm Cambodian sun.

For many years, I was “alone” on Valentine’s Day. A Hallmark holiday that ultimately made me feel worse about my relationship status more than anything else. This year, a friend opened my eyes to a new perspective.

Valentine’s Day is about spreading love celebrating the heart. It’s not about if you’re dating anyone or going to the fanciest candlelight restaurant. The day is about gratitude for those you care about most. That’s something I can get behind.

02.14.19

Today I’m Grateful For…

1. Store bought frosting
2. Time to take care of my to-do list
3. My classes and continued education
4. Clean water and texts from Cambodia
5. Catching the morning sunrise
6. Hanging out with my cat, Ned
7. My family
8. The sound of the train passing in the night by my house
9. Time at the gym
10. Teachers, mentors, and coaches
11. The upcoming weekend
12. Practice, practice, and more practice
13. Eating right and feeling good
14. Working together to achieve something
15. People who inspire
16. The sound of birds chirping outside my window in the morning
17. New learning
18. Time to journal and reflect
19. Summer grilling with my dad
20. Ultimate frisbee friends
21. Hanging out with my siblings in NY
22. Safe travels and good health
23. An opportunity to try
24. Moments I can redefine myself
25. The precious present

As always, check out my first blog 25 Things I’m Grateful For (#1) to know why I’m writing this list and why I want you to start yours.

If you’re interested in Guest Blogging for the Gratitude Journal, click (here)!

Classic picture of Ned